Chapter 8 - The Journey Begins

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The Yangtze River is as white as silk; the Huai Mountain is as green as shallow waters.

The river sails are as quick as arrows; the mountain springs flowing down with the speed of lightning.

The night clouds condense into crystal dew; the crescent moon half-circled like a fan. The wild geese returning from outside the Great Wall are lined up high in the sky like a thin silver thread.

...

The sound of horseshoes, wheels and horns.

The sunset glowed over the sky. The setting sun was like blood, and the dusk in Hangzhou was magnificent, yet lonely and desolate.

Luo Xuan and Liu Li were sitting in a spacious and comfortable carriage. They observed the towering city wall under the setting sun through the window, each immersed in their own thoughts. Nonetheless, they were both pondering on the odd changes in life.

The carriage passed through the city gate and drove slowly out of the city. There was no interception along the way. Xuanyuan Zhan probably knew that a few small city guards would not be able to restrain Luo Xuan. Indeed, matters of the martial arts world ought to be handled by martial artists only.

Ever since they got on the carriage, Liu Li leaned excitedly to the side of the window, taking in the scene before her. The sunset scenery of the ancient times was simply too beautiful. There was no thick smoke wastes coming from car exhausts in the sky nor were there any obstacles from high-rise buildings. Oh how she regretted not bringing a digital camera here with her.

Liu Li tried to make conversation with the servant who was steering the carriage. She found out that the man who was around 20 years old, with a little hunch on his back, was named Fu Shun. Liu Li thought, a typical name for a supporting role.

The adventure began, and Liu Li's smile never ceased even for a moment from the moment she entered the carriage. She has experienced less surprises in her life than she did in the span of today. Both Fu Shun and Luo Xuan were already used to how she would make a fuss about everything she saw, they simply looked helpless.

“Darling, how far are we from Sky Mountain?"

"Huh?" Luo Xuan still didn’t quite understand what this title meant.

Liu Li frowned and gave it some thought. Hm, I probably shouldn’t be so straightforward since we’re not even married yet. But it’s not as if he knows what it means, hehe, so it should be okay for me to take advantage of this! But she quickly changed her mind. Forget it. Didn't people like to call each other ‘brothers’ during ancient times? Brother Luo? Nah, it doesn't sound good and way too boring. What do those charming women usually call the men they liked, something like ‘gege*’, right? Luo gege? Xuan gege? Alright then, I’ll call him Xuan gege. It won't make people feel sick after hearing it!

*gege = elder brother. I chose to use ‘gege’ instead of ‘brother’ to avoid confusion because a lot of people will be calling him ‘Brother’.

So she immediately called him Xuan gege, pulling her voice so long that Luo Xuan kept getting goosebumps.

“Xuan gege, how far is Sky Mountain from here?"

“If we’re quick, it’ll take around a month!” Luo Xuan secretly hoped that this journey would be more on the peaceful side.

Liu Li wanted to faint...

F*ck, I have to toss and turn on such a bumpy road for a whole month! 555*, if only there’s a plane, we would be there in a few hours. How inconvenient. But then again, I get to spend a month with Luo Xuan in this little carriage! Haha! I’m certain that you will eventually fall in love with me.

*5 is pronounced as wu in Mandarin, so it sounds like a cry.

While she was immersed in her own bubble of happiness, she suddenly felt a little pain in her stomach, and her face instantly turned pale. She looked at Luo Xuan pitifully. “Xuan gege, I want to go to the bathroom."

"Huh?" Luo Xuan was taken aback again.

“It’s something like a latrine..." Liu Li secretly scolded herself for eating so much for lunch. Where can I find a toilet right now when we are in such wilderness? Forget it, I’ll have to solve it on the spot! Fu Shun stopped the carriage and waited by the side of the road. Liu Li was ashamed and didn't dare to run too far. She simply hid in a bush and looked around. At any rate, she was relieved. Fortunately, this era was developed enough that they had toilet paper. If she went to the Qin Dynasty like Xiang Shaolong, she would probably have to use bamboo tiles… Oh such sorrow and despair...

So when Liu Li returned to the carriage, her interest was 120000% piqued and she began to inquire about the ordinary life of the ancient Luo Xuan. One would have thought she looked like an archaeologist.

“Xuan gege, what kind of shampoo do you usually use? Do you really use saponins, polyporus and rice water?"

Luo Xuan was speechless.

“Xuan gege, what do you usually use to brush your teeth? Do you really use your fingers? You guys have already created a toothbrush, right?"

Luo Xuan was still speechless.

Liu Li kept asking. She remembered from the books that the ancient civilization used saponins, polyporus, plant ash, or rice water to wash their hair. You can also add spices to the polyporus, and it will have a relatively strong aroma after use. To brush your teeth, use salt, tooth powder and toothpaste to wipe your teeth, then gargle with a Chinese medicine decoction. The toothpaste seemed to be made of poria cocos and other medicinal materials. In order to make a toothbrush, you will have to squash the willow branches at one end to expose the fibers, and then wipe on the "toothpaste" as mentioned just now. Maybe there’s already toothbrushes made of bone, horns, bamboo, wood, etc.? You would then drill two rows of holes on the head, and clamp on the horse hair. Oh my god, can that work? Why didn't I bring a toothbrush? Wouldn't I be simply putting in a mouthful of green juice or horse hair?

Luo Xuan looked at her like he was looking at an odd creature. He was silent for the longest time. Fu Shun seemed to have gotten used to this strange girl. He smiled and asked, “Miss Liu Li has never brushed her teeth, right?”

"..." It was Liu Li’s turn to be speechless. Suddenly, she remembered that she hadn't brushed her teeth today. She instantly felt an uncomfortable sensation settling in her mouth.

But, she calculated the days a little miserably, the most important thing now is to find a woman and figure out exactly how the people in this era dealt with their periods! This is my top priority. There is no shop here that sells sanitary napkins!

She was really close to bursting into tears. No cars, no electricity, no refrigerators, no computers, no games, no phones, no music, no toothbrushes, no sanitary napkins… How can I live like this?! God! Help me!

Why didn’t those who travel through the past on TV worry about this? From the prosperous modern times to the ancient times, how did they survive? Does having love really mean that they have everything?

Liu Li suddenly felt miserable, and her small mouth fell flat.

Fu Shun just laughed happily outside. He cried, “Miss Liu Li is so humorous! I rarely see a weird girl like you. But my master told you to change your clothes. Your outfit is too glaring and easily spotted. I have your clothes and everything else ready for you. They are in the yellow bag next to you.”

"Oh!" Liu Li grabbed it with excitement. She can finally wear historical clothings!

Luo Xuan got up, preparing to sit outside. Liu Li said, “It's okay, Xuan gege, you can just close your eyes. Your white robes are too eye-catching, it will be troublesome if you are seen. (Hehe, you’re my future husband anyway, so I can take this opportunity to seduce you. Come on, baby, hurry up and fall in love with me!)

Luo Xuan pondered for a while, then slowly turned his head and closed his eyes. I heard the ruffling of clothes as Liu Li got changed. His face started to get hot, and for fear of triggering the poison, he quickly suppressed it with some internal strength. After a long time, he heard Liu Li muttering to herself, “Dudou*? Tiny clothes? Jacket? Pants? Skirt? Scarf? What are these pieces of cloth... Xuan gege, how do I put this on?”

*dudou = a traditional Chinese female undergarment, usually made of silk, covering the breasts and belly, and tied at the neck and waist.

Luo Xuan was very close to fainting. He must have run into an alien. She couldn't even wear her own clothes!

Unexpectedly, Fu Shun was not surprised by this at all. He taught her step by step how to put on those complicated clothes layer by layer, and how to tie the ends. Finally, she managed to put it all on. Liu Li’s face was flushed with joy. “Xuan gege, I’m done. You can open your eyes now. Am I wearing this right? Do I look pretty?” She smiled and waved her long sleeves, making orchid fingers. “Do I look like a fairy?”

When Luo Xuan saw her nondescript appearance, he was absolutely taken aback. “Can you take off the thing on your face? And your hair!”

"Oh!" Liu Li stroked out her curled hair into very small waves. She then wanted to move on to her braid, but decided against it at the last second. “Just wait for a little longer, and I’ll be able to comb it like those girls on TV. If it looks strange, I can wear a hat! But I don’t think I’ve ever seen a girl in periodic dramas on TV wearing a hat. Then I shall just wear this cloth covered bamboo hat, okay?" She tidied herself up and hid the necklace underneath her collar. After all, this is my treasure! If I lose it, I may never have the chance to go home for the rest of my life. Isn't it usually like this in dramas?

She busily went through the items she brought with her from her time. In addition to some clothes and a pair of piggy slippers, there was also an iPod, which was of rather high quality, waterproof and should still be usable. But what use is there if the power cannot be charged after use? Not to mention the lack of WiFi in ancient times. At the beginning, she tried to make a phone call home, but it obviously didn't get through. Now it can only be used to listen to songs and take pictures. Then there was some loose change and a few coins; a bunch of keychains with a small piggy flashlight hung on it. The size of the bulb was as small as a rice grain and it can only be used once, but it was bright and can be used for a long time. Aside from that, there was a very small nail clipper and a Swiss crusader knife. The two keys and the Mickey Mouse keychain seemed useless. Now, there was a very delicate 925 sterling silver bracelet. If they were to meet any financial difficulties in the future, they should be able to make a fortune if they pawn it. She laughed at the thought of this. There was also a 925 silver ring that she always wore on her thumb.

The necklace with a blue crystal pendant was a gift given by elder brother Fei Yu. She didn't want to wear it so she took it off. Suddenly, she felt a sharp stab in her heart when she held the necklace in her hand.

The pen that I always carry with me and a small notebook which can still be written on after it dries. A few earrings and ear studs. What else is there? Oh right, my glasses.

“But, these glasses, what should I do if I can't see things clearly after I take them off?" She had almost 400 degrees of short-sightedness! And it was all because of her constant habit of reading and using the computer.

Luo Xuan had long since been accustomed to filtering through the confusing words she would say. “Take it off and let me see.” Liu Li took off her glasses and leaned in, allowing Luo Xuan to look at her eyes.

“It’s fine. I will prescribe you some medicine later, and after taking it, your vision will slowly return to normal in a few days!”

"What? Really?" Liu Li was surprised and delighted. "So near-sightedness can be cured by taking medicine?"

Fu Shun laughed loudly outside the carriage. “That's for sure, Miss Liu Li. Sitting in front of you is Luo Xuan, the best divine physician in the world! Is there any disease in the world that he can't cure?"

However, Luo Xuan couldn't help but sigh when he heard this. The healer cannot heal himself. He is not even sure if he can get rid of the poison in his body.

However, Liu Li's eyes were sparkling with tears as she looked at Luo Xuan in admiration. Her pupils would have turned to heart shapes if it could. Turns out, my future husband is so powerful and great! She really wanted to jump forward, hug him and give him a firm kiss on the lips.

"Then Xuan gege, you should prescribe another medicine to cure acne for me! Also medicine for growing tall and medicine for weight loss, Xuan gege..."

Luo Xuan was about to have a headache while Fu Shun laughed. How did this journey of escape turn out to be so lively?