Chapter 21 - I Know What I'm Doing

This was an arduous battle that pushed the limits of Qiu Yanzhi’s mental and physical strength to the brink.

It was a choice testing his resolve to live and endure.

His agreement or refusal would decide if he sank or swam, but his destruction was assured whether he gave up or pressed onwards.

It really wasn’t a difficult decision for him.

Qiu Yanzhi closed his eyes as he looked up and pressed a solemn kiss to He Zhou’s lips.

Qiu Yanzhi's kiss was very skillful, which only further fanned the flames of He Zhou’s anger.

Qiu Yanzhi encircled He Zhou’s neck with his arms as he grew more used to the kiss. He began to think that He Zhou actually wasn’t bad the longer this kiss went on. At least his features suited Qiu Yanzhi’s tastes. If fact, if their previous experience didn’t haunt him so...

But Qiu Yanzhi quickly thought of a way for them to both get what they want. He kissed He Zhou on the eyebrow and patiently coaxed, "He Zhou, let me be on top, okay..?"

His proposition was immediately rejected.

Very viciously too.

Then he experienced a relentless retaliation after this vicious rejection.

This was because He Zhou suspected that Qiu Yanzhi’s previous words were secretly making fun of him.

That remark was clearly riddled with hidden barbs.

The Qiu Yanzhi of the next morning was no longer the Qiu Yanzhi of the night before.

He was Qiu “Dead fish on the inside and out” Yanzhi.

And yet the person responsible next to him actually had the audacity and lack of self reflection to approach him. He Zhou seemed quite proud of himself, acting like a student asking their teacher about a test they thought they aced.

Qiu Yanzhi could only smile weakly. "It's much better than last time."

That wasn’t a complete lie......

At least there's no blood this time, right?

Although he didn’t get the answer he wanted, He Zhou was appeased by this consolation prize.

Right now he was feeling more relaxed and open than ever. Turning to Qiu Yanzhi, he said with a smile, “Practice makes perfect when it comes to things like this.”

...You want to practice more?

When He Zhou saw Qiu Yanzhi stiffen for a moment, his smile widened into a coy and soulless smirk.

This was good.

He Zhou contentedly brought Qiu Yanzhi into his arms and rested his chin on the other’s soft black hair. He laughed, "Sleep a little while longer."

Qiu Yanzhi was indeed uncharacteristically tired. He yawned in He Zhou’s embrace and muttered, “Call me when you get up," before falling into a deep sleep.

By the time Qiu Yanzhi woke up, he didn't know what time it was anymore.

He stretched and slowly opened his eyes before he froze.

He was still in a never-ending expanse of white.

He was in a white and endless void lacking any trace of the sky or the earth.

His mind went blank again due to his overwhelming panic. He could no longer be sure that the series of events following He Zhou walking towards him had actually occurred, or whether it was an absurd, fantastical dream to comfort himself.

He got up and ran in a random direction, screaming He Zhou’s name. He didn’t know where he was going or where He Zhou was. He could only continue to run in this place where there was no end in sight.

Eventually he became too tired to run or shout.

He sat down and hugged his knees, burying his face in them.

No one knew about this.

Although Qiu Yanzhi clearly didn't have any close friends or caring family members, let alone a affectionate lover…

He was afraid of being abandoned.

And because he was afraid of being abandoned, he didn’t let anyone get close to him.

Right now, he felt like his worst fear had come true.

The entire world had forsaken him.

The sky, the earth, the world and all the creatures living in it had completely and utterly abandoned him.

His arms tightened bit by bit around his knees.

His shoulders were trembling slightly.

When He Zhou came home from work, he happened to catch a glimpse of someone sitting by the side of the road from the back of the car where he was looking over some documents. But he didn’t get a clear look before the car passed them by.

He Zhou felt uneasy and told the driver to go back.

The closer he got, the more familiar he felt this person looked.

When the car returned to that spot, he lowered the window and saw that it was indeed Qiu Yanzhi.

He Zhou told the driver to pull over as he opened the door and got out. "Qiu Yanzhi, what are you doing here?"

The man crouched by the road jerked as he was addressed. He slowly looked up.

His face was excessively pale, with the only colour coming from his red and swollen eyes. Dried tear tracks littered his face.

"He Zhou... "Qiu Yanzhi raised his head, somewhat dazed. His eyes closed and opened as tears continued to stream down his face. He was staring at He Zhou, but his eyes were not all there. “He Zhou...is that you..?"

He Zhou sensed that something was wrong. He crouched down in front of Qiu Yanzhi and wiped his tears. He frowned and asked, "What's wrong with you?"

Qiu Yanzhi suddenly grabbed his hand and cried. He cried so much that he couldn’t even catch his breath, let alone speak. “He Zhou...I can't see you anymore… Why can’t I see you anymore..."

He Zhou was stunned. "You can't see me?"

Qiu Yanzhi choked out, "I can’t, I can't see clearly...."

He Zhou came to his senses. He picked up Qiu Yanzhi and carried him into the car, hastily ordering the driver to head to the hospital.

Qiu Yanzhi also seemed to know that there was something wrong with his eyes. He became increasingly frantic and distressed, crying and asking He Zhou, “W-where did you go? Why weren’t you at home when I…”

He Zhou wiped his tears: "I went to work."

Qiu Yanzhi: "Why didn’t you tell me you went to work... Why? I told you to call me when you got up… You...why didn’t you wake me up…”

"I'm sorry... " For some reason, He Zhou started to panic when he saw the state Qiu Yanzhi was in. He fell over himself to comfort him softly, “I’m sorry, I was wrong… I’ll definitely wake you up next time… Don’t cry…”

The driver knew their situation was urgent so he stepped on the gas. Only when he stopped at a red light did he glance at the rearview mirror.

In the backseat, He Zhou held Qiu Yanzhi in his arms, carefully patting him on the back and offering gentle words of comfort.

It was very different from the indifference the driver saw last time from him as he left the drunk Qiu Yanzhi behind and got into the car alone.

"It's snow blindness." The doctor frowned, "But it’s not snowing outside right now… Did you just get back from a large ski resort or climb a snowy mountain recently or something?"

He Zhou answered for Qiu Yanzhi, "He didn't."

The doctor was a little puzzled. He shook his head and muttered, "How strange."

Qiu Yanzhi knew, however, that this was because of that white space.

That place was like a never-ending snowfield.

He didn’t think anyone knew what kind of light shone on that place, but it burned his eyes after he looked around too long.

The doctor gave him a prescription and said that the blindness was only temporary. His sight would return within 1-3 days.

Overall, it wasn't a very serious illness.

Qiu Yanzhi was lying in a hospital bed with a sterile cotton cloth on his eyes when he suddenly recalled how he cried without a hint of composure in front of He Zhou just now. The sheer embarrassment made him want to crawl into a hole and die.

He tried to explain, "...I just...I hadn’t fully woken up yet then… That plus my sudden blindness led to me breaking down.”

Qiu Yanzhi was sensitive to light right now, so He Zhou hummed softly in response as he turned off the lights in the room and shut the curtains.

Qiu Yanzhi shrank back and whispered, "...Don’t leave me without saying a word again."

“En," He Zhou said, "I won't."

After Qiu Yanzhi spent most of the day in the hospital, he was told that he could go home to recuperate.

Qiu Yanzhi was still wearing an eye patch and he was still practically blind. He walked with a tight grip on He Zhou's hand, moving forward inch by inch, looking cautious and uneasy.

Seeing this, He Zhou suddenly wrapped an arm around Qiu Yanzhi’s waist and carried him, smoothly putting the other person’s arm over his shoulders.

The sudden change in elevation made Qiu Yanzhi cry out quietly in alarm. He said uneasily after realizing he was being carried by a man in public, “...I can walk on my own."

He Zhou said seriously, "There are lots of stairs ahead."

"...Alright."

Qiu Yanzhi finally aceded and leaned against He Zhou.

"Huh?!" An old man in a wheelchair passed by, squinting his cataract riddled eyes at them. His voice was very loud and clear. “Is my eyesight finally failing? How come I can’t see these stairs? Ping-er, help me have a look. We might need to take another route around…”

The girl behind this old man couldn’t bear it anymore and whispered, “Grandpa, it’s fine, your eyes aren't blurry. Those two are just in love."

The old man's entire face crumpled as he shouted, "What?! What did you say?!! I can't hear you if you don’t speak up!"

The girl: "I said those two are in love! That’s why they deliberately said that!!”

The old man looked disgusted. "Gosh, young people nowadays! Why can’t they just be honest about their feelings!"

He Zhou: "......"

Qiu Yanzhi: "......"

With red ears, He Zhou hugged Qiu Yanzhi tightly and practically flew out of the hospital.

Qiu Yanzhi was hungry again when they arrived at home.

He Zhou asked, "What do you want to eat? I'll go make it for you."

Qiu Yanzhi was a little surprised. "You know how to cook? Then I want wontons, duck neck, grilled fish, stinky tofu, pizza, spaghetti, spicy hotpot and a big bucket of chicken."

He Zhou went silent. He then changed his question, "Do you want fried rice or instant noodles?"

Qiu Yanzhi: "......Fried rice."

"Okay, I'll make it for you."

By the time He Zhou brought the fried rice to the table, Qiu Yanzhi was already sitting on the chair with a spoon in hand, waiting impatiently.

For Qiu Yanzhi's convenience, He Zhou served the fried rice in a small bowl and placed it in Qiu Yanzhi's hand.

The freshly cooked fried rice was very fragrant, so Qiu Yanzhi couldn't help but take a deep breath.

Then he frantically dug in with his spoon and brought a heaping bite to his mouth.

...It’s so salty.

Qiu Yanzhi hesitated and asked He Zhou, "Did you have some too?"

He Zhou already had a suspicion that he didn’t make enough this time. When he heard Qiu Yanzhi mention it too, he said, “Is there not enough? I can give you my portion.”

Qiu Yanzhi quickly refused: "N-n-n-no need! How can I take your portion?!"

"It's fine." He Zhou pushed his bowl to Qiu Yanzhi's side and said generously, "I'm not hungry."

He Zhou looked at Qiu Yanzhi eating every spoonful solemnly and seriously, as if he treasured his cooking. He couldn't help but smile, "How does it taste?"

Qiu Yanzhi hesitated: "...It reminds me of the sea."

After all, this fried rice seemed to contain all the salt in the ocean.

He Zhou had never heard anyone praise his cooking in such a literary way. He became uncharacteristically flustered. "Then I'll make it for you every day in the future."

Qiu Yanzhi: "......"

Why was this Mr. He so confident in himself?

On the third day, Qiu Yanzhi's eyes were almost completely recovered, other than needing to put on the goggles recommended by the doctor when he went out. That’s why he dragged He Zhou along to the supermarket to buy something.

Qiu Yanzhi hasn't been out of the house for many days. Breathing in the outside air, he suddenly felt very refreshed, so he dragged He Zhou to the snack aisle.

Where they promptly ran into Shen Xingwei.

Shen Xingwei couldn’t help but stare at Qiu Yanzhi and He Zhou's tightly intertwined hands with a somewhat strange expression.

Qiu Yanzhi was socially adept enough to pick up that Shen Xingwei seemed to have something to say to He Zhou, so he let go of He Zhou's hand and said, "I'm going to pick up some mandarins from the next isle."

The brief period Qiu Yanzhi’s had to observe this world wasn’t enough for him to figure out if the NPCs he and He Zhou knew continued to exist when they weren’t in He Zhou’s sight. However, Qiu Yanzhi's entire world depended on He Zhou being present.

And the scope of the world that He Zhou’s presence allowed Qiu Yanzhi to see was not fixed. Sometimes Qiu Yanzhi could see far away into the horizon, but other times he might have to face the white void if he and He Zhou were a single flight of stairs apart.

Qiu Yanzhi quickly discovered some patterns to this madness.

In a sealed space, He Zhou's range of influence was small. In a vast space, He Zhou's range of influence was large.

In other words, the world he could see tended to be whatever was within He Zhou's line of sight.

If one was to compare this game to a TV drama...

He Zhou was the main character, so all the cameras followed him.

Qiu Yanzhi can only appear on screen if he followed He Zhou and took advantage of that fact.

And for Qiu Yanzhi, appearing on camera was equivalent to existing in the game world.

They were in a supermarket right now. As long as He Zhou didn’t leave, Qiu Yanzhi would be able to see the entire supermarket.

So Qiu Yanzhi was able to part from He Zhou, however reluctantly, so that he and Shen Xingwei could talk.

He Zhou had once angrily left home and Qiu Yanzhi for three days.

Half that time was spent in Shen Xingwei's bar.

He Zhou went to the bar, but he didn’t speak a word or sing karaoke. He just sat in the corner silently drinking wine.

Shen Xingwei was really afraid that he would drink himself into the hospital back then, so he sat beside He Zhou to keep him company and act as a voice of reason.

He Zhou was able to keep most of his composure when drunk. His face wasn’t flushed and he didn’t cause a scene or faint either. The only thing that changed was his willingness to open up.

Shen Xingwei only heard a few bits and pieces, but he knew that He Zhou came here to drink because of Qiu Yanzhi.

He heard about how Qiu Yanzhi used various underhanded and morally ambiguous methods to force He Zhou to marry him.

He didn’t know if He Zhou had fallen for Qiu Yanzhi’s act, but judging by how much wine he was drinking, he must have felt something once.

However, the key point was that Qiu Yanzhi didn’t even seem to like He Zhou.

Shen Xingwei remembered clearly the first day He Zhou stayed at his bar. After slamming back his last glass, He Zhou spoke in a harsh voice with fiercely red eyes, “Qiu Yanzhi deceived me, so I will make him pay me back twofold.”

Shen Xingwei remembered that he couldn't help but clap for He Zhou when he heard this. He was really rooting for his friend to do something great and really humiliate that wretched Qiu Yanzhi.

The next day when He Zhou came back to the bar, he had mostly calmed down and didn’t mention his revenge on Qiu Yanzhi again.

Shen Xingwei couldn't help but lean over and ask him how he was going to handle this matter with Qiu Yanzhi.

He Zhou calmly poured himself another glass of wine and downed it before saying, "I don't want to be involved with him anymore. There’s no point and it isn’t worth the effort. I’ve decided to divorce him. Tomorrow I’ll draw up a divorce agreement with my lawyer and sever all ties with him.”

...But why haven’t they divorced yet after so many days? More than that, why were they shopping at this supermarket while holding hands??

Shen Xingwei whispered, "Are you going with plan A to take care of him? How are you going to get back at him?"

He Zhou pursed his lips and didn't speak.

Shen Xingwei keenly sensed that something was off. He narrowed his eyes and asked, "Did you decide to forgive him and give up on your revenge?"

"...I've grasped his weak point.” He Zhou paused, his tone rather unconvincing, "I will get back at him eventually."

“But how?" Shen Xingwei took out a bag of fruit candies that obviously weren’t for He Zhou from the shopping cart he was pushing, "With fruit candies?"

"Do you want to get back at him with these chocolates?"

"Or maybe these two cups. Hmph, I guess you’re not completely over him after all.”

Looking at Shen Xingwei's knowing gaze towards that set of cups, He Zhou couldn't help but blush. He snatched them back and said coldly,  "I know what I’m doing."

Shen Xingwei pointed at the pile of vitamins and supplements, somewhat puzzled, "Wait, what are you buying so many vitamins for?"

He Zhou said, "He was diagnosed with snow blindness, and the doctor recommended some vitamins and supplements."

Shen Xingwei: "......"

Shen Xingwei patted He Zhou's shoulder and let out a long sigh, "Good luck, my friend. Keep up the good work. Oh, don't forget to invite me when you two celebrate your anniversary."

He Zhou: "......"